Perhaps I am just not as good as I think I am... Recently 3 of my applications to scholarship and universities were rejected. Shell rejected me outright, Cambridge rejected me after making me wait anxiously for 4 days thanks to their 'we are going to send you your results tomorrow' mail, and imperial just rejected me as well by offering me a biomedical engineering course which is like err.... The reason given - I am just not good enough I think. Alright, they didn't really put it that way but they might as well do that. I mean what's the difference right?
Honestly, I thought I am more mature right now and failures are easier to deal with. But it seems like no matter how many times I fail, each failure seems to be more painful than the last. Arghhhh, what is the matter with me? Why can't I get into any of the top universities? Am I just stupid? Or dumb? This is just so frustrating!!!!
Right now my options are really getting narrower and narrower and at the moment, I am really getting no where without any concrete offer from realistic universities. Sad isn't it? Haiz. I really hate to pity myself because it is just pathetic! You hear me pathetic! So just get over these and start working to improve yourself as a whole! Its not over yet. I am going to get something by the end of the day. I will!!!
Sorry peeps, this is turning out to be a self-conversing blog. But not many people read it anyway, so...
Anyways, I really have got to pull things together and just improve myself. Maybe I should work on my self-presenting skills and my English which is horrendous. Well, right now my A levels exam is going to finish next week and after that I have got to work even harder to secure at least a good scholarship and a good university placing. Singapore is my main target but who knows right? Not looking too far ahead though. Till next time...
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